What if?

How much great it would be if there was a 24hr dedicated information and investigative TV channel which helps people, like if any common is facing any problem from any govt official/department to get his/her work done as per law, the common man can contact this channel and the channel will accompany with a camera crew film his experience at the govt office and put it for the world to see, first everyone knows that everyone behaves differently when they know someone is watching them,and of that someone is the whole nation they definitely would desist from corruption atleast as long as they are on camera, I know they might turn back to corruption once they get off the camera but the point is instill a sense of fear in public servants that the common man is not hopeless but he has a voice which can turn into a roar which the whole country can hear, I just think that this would be a great idea, why nobody has tried something like this, no prizes for guessing everybody knows why.

Mind: Lost/Found

Mind: Lost/Found



My mind met with an accident
and both of them ran away
i told my friends about the elope
my friends said 'man have you lost your mind?'


i tried to give a police complaint about my mind
the police asked for proof that it existed
told them that my screwed up life was the proof
my mind is a fugitive on the run, they'll catch it soon

its been a week that i lost my mind
still no word from my beloved friend
now i have doubts if it was an elope or a kidnap
my mind can't do anything interesting to elope i felt


couple of days later i finally got a call asking for ransom
it was my ego that had kidnapped my mind
and in lieu of my mind all it asked was me and my life
i laughed and told my ego i am you, you are me


P.S: Since I got my mind back, i am feeling that my mind has developed a kind of Stockholm syndrome with my ego, I am yet to take revenge from my ego, it messed with me, I am gonna hurt its ego now.

Horror movie cliches

Is it just me or there is absolutely no horror movie with normal thinking people in it? i mean why do horror have utterly stupid,dumb idiots? just because to progress a story which would fall flat if the characters acted smart at the very beginning?, i have seen a lot of horror movies and none have characters with basic IQ values, i dont expect geniuses in a horror movie but cmon, i know some people may call me sick for saying this but watching all that stupidity engulf the screen, now whenever i watch a horror movie i have started to feel that maybe these dumb idiots deserved to die(is that sick to think of?).

Also every horror movie has to happen in a big fu**ing house with 20 rooms at least,why cant someone shoot a horror movie in a one room house?
When any freaky things happen people get alerted but not in a lot of horror movies they act like nothing has happened, it might sound childish but how about when you feel something is going to happen a particular night call a lot friends on a party with people roaming everywhere in the house(lol) just to throw the ghost off its plan

I know the ultimate aim of a horror movie is to scare people and all the above act against that very purpose, but I am sick of the cliches that horror movies offer.

P.S: now thats some rant but seriously off late i am getting furious watching horror movies, for once cant someone make a horror movie which is challenging and not just scary, where a character challenges the ghost with intelligence and smartness and the gives the ghost some homework to do before it does its job of whatever it does?

Shit Indian Politicians Say.

I saw many videos on youtube recently like Shit Guys say or Shit girl say etc etc which made me think why not write something about our beloved politicians who are nothing but a load of cliche in every way, I cant make a video(I wish I could),so here are some of the stuff I hear from Indian politicians so much that its annoyingly trite,read on.


Shit Indian Politicians Say



1) I have not seen the report in its totality, I will comment once I see the report
2) The matter is subjudice, I cant comment on this issue
2) Let the law take its own course
3) We condemn this as a brutal act of terrorism
4) The government has failed on all fronts
5)The government has lost all its credibility, the prime minister should step down immediately
6) Arnaub Arnaub, let me speak let me speak
7)My dear friend from the opposition should know that
8)This has been done to tarnish my image
9)I see an external hand behind all this
10)Vote for us
11) I am innocent
12) I have done nothing wrong
13) There is no question of me stepping down
14)We demand a CBI probe into this incident
15)Vote
16)Vote for us
17) The government has no constitutional authority to continue
18)Its a black spot on democracy
19) Constitution cannot be written on the streets
20) The communal forces are behind this
21)We are staging a walk out in protest
22)A investigation committee has be constituted and it will submit its report soon
23)Vote for us
24)All the allegations leveled against me are totally baseless
25)There is not a shred of truth in the opposition's allegations
26)The perpetrators of this heinous crime will not be spared
27)Anna Hazare cannot blackmail the constitutional practices
28)Vote for us, we will eradicate poverty
29)We will give you TV sets, Clothes, bicycles
30)If voted to power we will
31)A unanimous decision has been taken
32) The talks have been unproductive, we will be meeting again.
33) Arnaub Aurnauub let me finish let me finish first.
34) Madam will take a decision regarding the matter
35) Our main agenda is development.
36)Coalition dharma demands us to do this.
37) We will win all the seats in this election
38)Booze has flowed like water in the election from the other side
39) The MLA's have been shifted to a resort in Goa to avoid horse trading.
40)Our support to the government is only on conditional basis
41)We have lost a great leader, he was a honest and able politician.
42)We are supporting the government from outside.
43) we have met the governor/President and given out letter of support to him.
44)He was a leader of the masses.
45)I cant believe that the opposition can stoop so low
46)We are just following what previous government policy was.
47)Price rise is being taken seriously, we will see to it that the common man does not bear the burnt.
48)The budget is a total waste of money, we demand the resignation of the fin minister.
49)This is best budget ever, we congratulate the finance minister for such a pro-people budget.
50)We accept the people's mandate and respect it.

Ran Tho

India in a way is a communist nation, at the outset it has a democratic setup and calls itself a democracy but if you look deeper you see patterns of communism in this country, for ex India has different states which are ruled by respective state governments which in turn report to the centre, each state has its own budget depending on budget at the centre and each state has its own election, so people of respective states vote for their local government, now take the case of Karnataka, people of the state elect their government democratically, the government implements particular policies for the people who voted for them, but as per the constitution of our country any citizen can travel anywhere and work, so say a person from UP/Bihar comes to Karnataka constitutionally it might not seem wrong, but logically he has not stake in the elected democratically functional government of Karnataka but he reaps the benefits of the locals having elected a progress oriented government while the people who voted for a good government might not even get the benefits of the policies of the government they so rightly elected, There is no motivation for guy from UP/Bihar/Tamil Nadu/AP etc etc to elect a progress govt in his own state, cause he knows that even if the govt he elected in incompetent and doesnt give a damn about development and jobs there are already government in Karnataka/Maharashtra/Gujarat etc where he will definitely get a job. so isnt this in away a kind of communism i.e., immaterial of the govt I elect even if it is incompetent I will still reap the benefits of good governance elsewhere and at the same time immaterial of the good govt I elect here in Karnataka I probably will not reap the benefits of it cause somebody from some other state has got a job and I dont, if this is not communism then what is?

The simple solution is reserve some percentage of jobs say 50% or 60% at the minimum for locals of any state, this way the people who were responsible for good governance will at least reap some benefits of their actions, this way other state people where there is a incompetent govt will feel motivated to elect a govt which focuses on their problems, this way other states will create more jobs and on the whole the country progresses, this irresponsible behavior of some states thinking some other state will create jobs for citizens of other state neglecting the native people is leech mindset, it should not be encouraged.

We are dumb(sometimes dumber)

the other day i was wondering if all the politicians are dumb for accumulating so much wealth in the tunes of thousands of crores, I was finding it amusing and sick that shit holes dont know even know so much money is of no use when you cant spend it, i went on a couple of days and it later hit me, they are not dumb as much as we are(the public), cause a politician knows he wont be needing all that money for himself but to create an imbalance in the society, if everybody has money the politicians are fucked to their graves, who will listen to their promises who will want their false hope except themselves? and we go on shitting happily how much a particular politician has accumulated money as if its an achievement, Shame on us.

Upcoming Blockbuster

The 2G Scam is so 2010, India deserves a better,updated and fresh scam, and in the anticipation of the scam which has so happened already but not yet out,The 3G Spectrum Scam in short 3G(remember the controversy surrounding 3G allocation and the constant delays) ,here is the synopsis about it.

Production : Congress Prodctions in association with UPA Productions financed by 'We,The People' Productions.

After successfuly brining you their previous blockbusters such as 2G and CWG and much loved classics such as Bofors we proudly present our new venture a sequel to the blockbuster 2G-The Scam, this time bigger budget(to loot),bigger cast.

Title: '3G'(Punch Line: Uncle Scam wants you, alternate punch line: Scam or Sham who gives a damn)

Plot: The story is as usual, run of the mill story of this nation,A loots B,B loots C,C loots D,D loots E so on and so forth, not a new story but still the people will relate to it,eventhough there will be a deja vu feeling with the story,common man's lethargy will rule the day paving way for many more sequels.

Genre: Horror/Drama/Crime/Suspense/Thriller/Comedy/Action

Directed by : Laziness and and sab kuch chalta hai attitude of the common man.

Music by : Cacophony of crows,pigs,dogs and wails of people crying in despair

Stunts/Action : None from the common man to stop it.

Cast: Politicians,Common man in short You,me,We,Us everybody.

Release date : Coming soon to a misery near you.